Online Dating Tips--Don't Fall in Love with Online Dating
by Stella Larue
Cyber dating has been stigmatized for a long time. In the past, dating sites were seen as arenas for the desperate and lonely. Now, though, it has broken out...become mainstream, an acceptable way for busy singles to meet others. Everybody's doing it! Some sources claim that over 40% of all single American adults (or 50 million) have tried internet dating.
So, just by the sheer numbers involved, there's sure to be a lot of quality people on these dating sites. And the vast majority of them are just as nice, curious, open, vulnerable, and date-less as you. So approach fellow online daters with compassion and a sense of humor.
Cyber dating may well be a viable option for you, if you go into it with the right attitude. Realize up front that online dating is simply a temporary, convenient, superficial way to be introduced to a lot of other singles in a short period of time...That's all it is! And always remember that the computer sitting on your desktop or lap is only a PLASTIC BOX. The internet is wild and wonderful, and has piped into our homes an amazing, colorful world. There's an almost magical quality to it, isn't there? And there's a tendency to think it can work magic for us, too. Well, it can't! It's only a piece of hardware.
Your computer will not magically turn you into a popular, confident social animal. Do not look at the internet as your "Great white hope" in finding your soulmate. If you go into it with that kind of attitude, you will surely fail!
Instead, think of online dating as simply a means of introduction. Try it for a limited time, and make it one small part of your social life. And remember that once you get past the introduction, and meet face-to-face, you are back at square one, in the old-fashioned dating game. What is the main advantage of online dating? Anonymity. The anonymity of online encounters lets you get your foot in the door, when otherwise; you might have just been passed by in real life. A potential date is forced to talk to you instead of rejecting you quickly on a superficial physical level. Anonymity also makes shy people bold! It's easy to flirt in cyberspace, and seductive in its own right. It temporarily banishes loneliness, and you can get addicted to it. The trouble is, it's not real. You aren't really flirting, you know? You can't kiss through the modem.
Online dating is only a means to an end, which is to find a suitable dating partner. Don't get caught up in the e-dating lifestyle permanently. Get beyond the email stage as soon as mutual interest is clear. And no matter how emotionally involved you may feel, remember, it is not possible to fall in love with someone you've never met!
There's simply no way to know if the chemistry is there without a face-to-face encounter. So it's foolish to let an online "romance" go on and on without meeting. Lots of emotional investment at risk, and possibly a lot of time wasted, too.
Get on the phone... get a real date... and you're on your way!
About the Author
Stella Larue is the "gangleader" of a small group of women who have put together an innovative and interesting website, Findlove-Keeplove.com. This site provides a plan-- and supplies all the tools, free of charge-- to help you find true love and keep it safe forever!